Going Down in History - Favorite Clubs:)
Aug. 10th, 2004 02:30 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
mrdreamjeansI'm just finishing up a fun chat with lowfatmuffin and I asked Bob how he met his friend Lance (althrman). According to Bob, they met in a landmark Seattle bar named Spags 13 years ago. Bob was singing karaoke; Lance was visiting. They've been great friends ever since.
I started to think back to what clubs have gone down in my memory as significant places. Were they because of friends I met in them? Was it because of the music? Was it because they represented a way of life that no longer exists? Or is it because I have changed so much, that they will remain my sample of that slice of life?
Bob maintains that some bars/clubs had significance because, "its the people in your life that made that place so wonderful". I respectfully have to disagree. I went to bars, not to drink, not to make friends, but as a way of trying to understand where I fit in.... as an anonymous way of studying the other men in the place... as a place for approbation... I wanted to learn... to discover what I brought to the table in terms of attractiveness and appeal....and to decide who and what I liked on the most basic of levels. I could never hide behind drugs or alcohol; I could lose myself in the music; but I always wanted to be responsible for my actions.
My coming out was a very slow process. I went to a very conservative university, Texas A&M; I had no frame of reference.... Gay or Lesbian family members, Gay or Lesbian Friends... I was just one of those guys in the ROTC, playing at the military, who realized one day that I spent an awful lot of time trying to meet other guys' eyes on campus. My first contact was with my Freshman English Professor who was married with three kids. (Yes - I got an A in the class, but I still vigorously defend it as deserved because of my writing:)
During my college years, you could still go to bars if you were over 18. The drinking laws in Texas didn't change to 21 until it didn't apply to me. I was 20 years old when I first went to a Gay club and it still exists today, albeit under a different name. I believe that bars have fallen out of favor in recent years as the primary place to meet "family"; but in the 1970s, they were my only source of contact with other Gay men.
There are three clubs that stick out in my mind. One is long gone; one is still alive and kicking under a different name and one retains its name, but has lost its charm.
The first one was called The Locker. It was on Westheimer in Houston and had its heyday in the 1970s.... I'd go there on a Sunday afternoon and there would be 150-200 guys having sex:) I loved to watch... learned a lot too.... I was really young... met my first boyfriend there... a red-headed marine who was really old...30!... I was 20:) Ah, those were the days....
The second club was the Brazos River Bottom in Houston. It's still kicking. In fact, that's where beararchitect (Fernando) and and I went dancing two weeks ago. It was significant because I learned to dance with another guy there; found out I was a good lead, found out that I could relax and be myself on the dance floor and found a niche with which I was comfortable. I dated a couple of guys from there, but I was very split between the sexually charged environment of the Locker and the fun and romance of the BRB. I kept searching for a happy medium.... and a happy medium in the men.....
My other choice would be the Timberline of the early to mid-90s.... It was so romantic, the dancing of such high quality, the ambiance unlike anywhere else I've been... It made me fall in love with Seattle. The BRB and Timberline stand out in my mind because in any other bar/club setting, if there wasn't music, I relished the role of loner... I could stand in a corner and observe. I soon learned that I had a strong presence to which other men would react and project their desires. I learned to keep my mouth shut in the leather levi bars; to never show warmth and personality and often the imminent sexscapade would be hot and memorable.
Luckily, I've moved way beyond that narrow view. In the past couple of decades, I've tried to let folks know me for my flawed, opinionated, curious, artistic, friendly, warm, compassionate, huggy self. I still struggle with bringing my romantic and sexual interests together in one person, but I've made progress and will do so till I get it right:)
I was a product of my times, but I've also learned to change and grow with the times. The role of bars in our culture has changed and their role in my life has changed. Being nostalgic for the experiences, for the wonderful and wicked sights I saw, isn't always bad, is it?
Right now, I'm going to go down my history lane of favorite clubs and remember them, and the people in them, and I'm going to smile and enjoy.
I started to think back to what clubs have gone down in my memory as significant places. Were they because of friends I met in them? Was it because of the music? Was it because they represented a way of life that no longer exists? Or is it because I have changed so much, that they will remain my sample of that slice of life?
Bob maintains that some bars/clubs had significance because, "its the people in your life that made that place so wonderful". I respectfully have to disagree. I went to bars, not to drink, not to make friends, but as a way of trying to understand where I fit in.... as an anonymous way of studying the other men in the place... as a place for approbation... I wanted to learn... to discover what I brought to the table in terms of attractiveness and appeal....and to decide who and what I liked on the most basic of levels. I could never hide behind drugs or alcohol; I could lose myself in the music; but I always wanted to be responsible for my actions.
My coming out was a very slow process. I went to a very conservative university, Texas A&M; I had no frame of reference.... Gay or Lesbian family members, Gay or Lesbian Friends... I was just one of those guys in the ROTC, playing at the military, who realized one day that I spent an awful lot of time trying to meet other guys' eyes on campus. My first contact was with my Freshman English Professor who was married with three kids. (Yes - I got an A in the class, but I still vigorously defend it as deserved because of my writing:)
During my college years, you could still go to bars if you were over 18. The drinking laws in Texas didn't change to 21 until it didn't apply to me. I was 20 years old when I first went to a Gay club and it still exists today, albeit under a different name. I believe that bars have fallen out of favor in recent years as the primary place to meet "family"; but in the 1970s, they were my only source of contact with other Gay men.
There are three clubs that stick out in my mind. One is long gone; one is still alive and kicking under a different name and one retains its name, but has lost its charm.
The first one was called The Locker. It was on Westheimer in Houston and had its heyday in the 1970s.... I'd go there on a Sunday afternoon and there would be 150-200 guys having sex:) I loved to watch... learned a lot too.... I was really young... met my first boyfriend there... a red-headed marine who was really old...30!... I was 20:) Ah, those were the days....
The second club was the Brazos River Bottom in Houston. It's still kicking. In fact, that's where beararchitect (Fernando) and and I went dancing two weeks ago. It was significant because I learned to dance with another guy there; found out I was a good lead, found out that I could relax and be myself on the dance floor and found a niche with which I was comfortable. I dated a couple of guys from there, but I was very split between the sexually charged environment of the Locker and the fun and romance of the BRB. I kept searching for a happy medium.... and a happy medium in the men.....
My other choice would be the Timberline of the early to mid-90s.... It was so romantic, the dancing of such high quality, the ambiance unlike anywhere else I've been... It made me fall in love with Seattle. The BRB and Timberline stand out in my mind because in any other bar/club setting, if there wasn't music, I relished the role of loner... I could stand in a corner and observe. I soon learned that I had a strong presence to which other men would react and project their desires. I learned to keep my mouth shut in the leather levi bars; to never show warmth and personality and often the imminent sexscapade would be hot and memorable.
Luckily, I've moved way beyond that narrow view. In the past couple of decades, I've tried to let folks know me for my flawed, opinionated, curious, artistic, friendly, warm, compassionate, huggy self. I still struggle with bringing my romantic and sexual interests together in one person, but I've made progress and will do so till I get it right:)
I was a product of my times, but I've also learned to change and grow with the times. The role of bars in our culture has changed and their role in my life has changed. Being nostalgic for the experiences, for the wonderful and wicked sights I saw, isn't always bad, is it?
Right now, I'm going to go down my history lane of favorite clubs and remember them, and the people in them, and I'm going to smile and enjoy.
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