The Eve of Christmas

[mrdreamjeans]

I’ve learned a lesson. Live in the present during the holidays. If you’re going to miss December 25 with your nuclear family, then be fortunate enough to spend the holiday season with friends who embrace the moments you have together and make them special.

I have a 1:30pm matinee today here in Newark and then hop Amtrak to Washington, DC about 6:20pm. I’ll check into my hotel in DC tonight and then spend most of Christmas Day and the 26th with my friends Henry and Geoffrey in Arlington, Virginia. "Evita" opens in DC on the 27th.

I did not expect to have such a good time in Newark. The Secret Santa follies at work have been fun. Each night after the show, there have been unexpected faces appear back stage ... actors I’ve worked with in previous tours or on other shows and also actors who were in the cast of “Evita” earlier in our year-long journey. The unexpected gift of time with bearfuz, john_nyc, vern_nyc, the octothorpe and pagerbear is to be cherished. Meeting perlcub, unzeugmatic and badfaggot was a treat and today I get to meet sohipithurts. Vinny’s seeing our final performance and then we’re going to visit for a bit, until it’s time to train to DC.

Also in this mix , was a delightful breakfast with my dear friend Bill Gilinksy. Bill is my stage manager friend who gave me his apartment for three weeks while we were putting “Evita” together in October 2004. He just came back from India where he sang a concert for a Nobel Peace Prize nominee; to my surprise he brought back a kitschy silk tie (with elephants on it) for me:) Along with gotmoof, Mom and Dad refer to Bill as their “son”.

I may in a hotel room tomorrow, but I’ll be on the phone checking in with people. My family will be scattered, but we’ll be in close touch. I won’t be alone thanks to the events of the past two weeks. I have a lot to remember and for which to be thankful on the Eve of Christmas.

Comments

[ciddyguy.livejournal.com]

Enjoy the day tomorrow with friends.

Hugs to you my friend!

[mrdreamjeans.livejournal.com]

Merry, Merry Christmas, John!

[bearfuz.livejournal.com]

You deserve happiness because you appreciate and share it so well. More people should have your spirit.

[mrdreamjeans.livejournal.com]

Thanks, Chip! I'm ensconced in the Carlysle Suites in DC. It's on New Hampshire near 17th and not far from Dupont Circle. The cast of "Wicked" is staying here too. The train ride down was pleasant, though the car overheated and I sat next to pregnant woman who "dished" on the cell phone for 2 1/2 hours straight:) We arrived early; Henry and Geoff picked me up and delivered me to the hotel and I managed a quick meal at a nearby restaurant before it closed. I just spoke to Tim (gotmoof) for an hour on the phone.... all in all, a nice day which gracefully transitioned into Christmas Day. May John and you have a lovely holiday and know that one of my best gifts this season is the affection and friendship you've offered me. Big HUGS!

M-XMAS!

[tkn1114.livejournal.com]

Happy Christmas, Neil. Seen Brokeback Mtn yet? It's so... A&M! Just kidding :0) Good movie: an A. So painfully redneck. So subtlely asian. So close to home.

Re: M-XMAS!

[mrdreamjeans.livejournal.com]

Happy Christmas to you too, Thanh! I'm looking out here at grey skies, I'm in a residential area approximately three long blocks from Dupont Circle. (Oddly enough, I'm staying around the corner from the Argentinian Embassy:) I'm very happy for the quiet of the hotel and the three days till another show.

I haven't made it to any movies since Harry Potter came out. So, I've still got "Rent", "Brokeback Mountain", "Goodnight and Good Luck", "Mrs. Henderson" and "Pride and Prejudice" on my list to see. I may see the latter here in DC today in the company of the friends with whom I'm having Christmas.

I suspect that Brokeback may hit very close to home. It's only a decade earlier than my first experiences in a similar world. I'm hearing all positive feedback about the film; but for some reason, it's last on this list in terms of my interest.

Musings

[tkn1114.livejournal.com]

I hope you'll get a chance to see Brokeback. I'd love to hear your opinion on it. I thought the french release's title was much more interesting "Le secret de Brokeback Mountain".
I'm intrigued by America's obsession over self-imposed emotional suppression - esp. gay America, even though Brokeback is a good story very well told and, as such, deserves the praise and attention a good story well told deserves. But some reactions from the gay community seem to go well beyond that...? I see entire websites dedicated to discussion of the movie on the net. Makes you think?...
RO seems to be the only one who did'nt cry even though he claims he can do it at the drop of a hat and I believe him. I was relieved to learn this because I did'nt cry, either :0) It simply did'nt have that effect on me even though I gave the movie an A. And now I must sound like that "self-righteous queen he urged to go see the movie and cry a little" because "it won't melt your face" - precious, don't you think? I do love him so, don't you?

In other news, I keep waiting for that feeling of desperate loneliness to descend upon me around this time of year but it does'nt come. May be you have to be a Christian to be susceptible to this? :0) I cringed when my mother in Philadelphia told me that my brother and his wife were preparing a banquet for 30 people on Xmas Eve. Growing up we had sumptuous holiday seasons that began with Xmas and New Year and lasted well into Chinese New Year (usually 2 full months) I always enjoyed myself immensely and would again, but I don't miss them. I'm worried, is there something wrong with me? :0)

May be it's my present state of mind? I've accomplished a great deal on my 1st and 2nd plays this week-end.

Break a leg in the capital!

Re: Musings

[mrdreamjeans.livejournal.com]

I spent Christmas in the home of my friends Henry and Geoffrey in Arlington. Henry fixed a lovely dinner and then we headed out to "King Kong" ...sold out ... Instead, we saw "Brokeback Mountain". Without breaking it all down, the movie has stayed with me ... overnight ... this morning ...The final third of the movie packed an emotional wallop, primarily because they took the time to develop the relationships. It especially resonated with me because it hit very close to home (after all, I was at A&M in the early 70s); I had closeted relationships like theirs; I witnessed, first-hand, similar violence and was a victim of it in college (though, of course, not with end result in the film).

I did cry. I was the last one out of the theater. I just sat in my seating, staring at the credits. I know the inside of that cowboy closet ... Never again ... I may struggle in learning how to connect to other men because of my early history, but I will continue to learn ... eventually understand how to create real relationships where they don't begin and end with quick, dismissive sex.

The movie is powerful and the performances well-done. Heath Ledger, his real-life wife Michelle Williams and Anne Hathaway (a long way from Princess Diairies) were amazing.

On your other subject ... There are often times when I am alone ... however, I believe more and more that loneliness is a choice. Sometimes, I make this choice; but most of the time, I make sure my emotional life is rich enough that I don't. Perhaps, you don't miss the big celebrations because your inner life is full ... rich with ideas, dreams and stories yet to tell ...

Hugs ....

Thank you

[tkn1114.livejournal.com]

for the exchange of ideas and emotions always appreciated and cherished. I did think about you and other friends of similar background while in the movie house (notably A&M but not limited to) I can only imagine the pain, the frustration. I feel lucky, and I feel for you, for us. I feel the more compelled to do what I'm doing. BTW, I was thinking, should my thing bang and they make a musical version of it, you have a part in it (that's perfect for you) for as long as the musical runs!

You may well be right about fullfilled inner life. Well, to tell the truth, it can always be *more* fullfilled :0) But I'm lucky in that I always manage to be passionate about something. I have to. It provides me a focus, a direction. My parents might have made sure of that. There's always been a creative outlet in my life - before this writing, the clothing. So, now there's more. Whenever I'm bored, I'm unhappy. Oxymoron but true. But the trick is also not become a workaholic - I find them tediously boring!

A friend from SF who wrote the movie Under One Roof recently visited and we agreed that the difference between us is that he's in search of artistic fullfillment whereas I write because of political motivations even if I did'nt have artistic satisfaction from design work which, fortunately, I do.

This comes with some relief, because I don't want to write for vanity right now. There are in fact stories yet to tell.

Hugs of an american revolutionary :0)

Re: Thank you

[mrdreamjeans.livejournal.com]

I am proud to know an American Revolutionary!

If there's a part that's perfect for me, give me great songs ... and make sure I don't do all the recordings and then have them tell me, "no one will ever sing it better, Neil" and then ask me who I would recommend they get to play the role. That's happened too many times ...LOL ... Make sure the character is better served by age and experience:)

Don't ever lose your passion! It's what sets you apart!

HUGS! Happy Boxing Day!

Diva worshipping

[tkn1114.livejournal.com]

I love it when you're such a diva! So fabulously grand :0)
You do realize that "Nooone will ever sing it better, Neil" is your equivalent of "I'm ready for my close-up, Mr de Mille", don't you?
The character who's from the 70's generation *is* better served by age and experience, and to some extent epitomizes the kind of Brokeback Mtn cowboys pain southerners seem to know best. I'm telling you you're perfect for it, else I would'nt have even mentioned it.
He does die in the middle of the 2nd act but leaves a legacy and is forever whorshipped. Now, *I know* you can handle that! :0)

Re: Diva worshipping

[mrdreamjeans.livejournal.com]

hmmmm.... "worshipped" .... sounds good to me .... *grin*

... wait a minute ... I'm looking at your spelling ...

horsewhipped ...?
whore shipped ...?

I hope you meant worshipped:) LOL!

Well

[tkn1114.livejournal.com]

He wanted to be whorewhipped but ends up being worshiped :0)