Investments 2008 (Borrowed Humor)

[mrdreamjeans]

Investment tips for 2008

For all of you with any money left, be aware of the next expected mergers so that you can get in on the ground floor and make some BIG bucks. Watch for these consolidations in 2008:

1.Victoria's Secret and Smith & Wesson will merge under the new name Titty Titty Bang Bang.

2. Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W. R. Grace Co. will merge and become Hale, Mary, Fuller, Grace.

3. Polygram Records, Warner Bros., and Zesta Crackers join forces and become Poly, Warner, Cracker.

4. 3M will merge with Good Year and become MMMGood.

5. Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining will merge and become ZipAudiDoDa

6. FedEx is expected to join its competitor, UPS, and become FedUP.

7. Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will become Fairwell Honeychild.

8. Grey Poupon and Docker Pants are expected to become Poupon Pants.

9. Knotts Berry Farm and the National Organization of Women will become Knott NOW!

Comments

[scottokc.livejournal.com]

ROFL! Here's one I heard - Ivana Trump married and divorced in succession actor Orson Bean, King Oscar of Norway, Louis Mayer of MGM, and mathematician Norbert Weiner. (Yes, there is a person by that name.) That would make her - Ivana Bean Oscar Mayer Weiner. (Groan.)

[philhasablog.livejournal.com]

I hate that I love this.

[robearal.livejournal.com]

Fairwell Honeychild sounds like a classic Bond Girl name.

[weekilter.livejournal.com]

Have you considered seeking professional help? :)

[cimarrondfw.livejournal.com]

Oh, dear, Neil, you did need a break bad. LOL Loved it. Takes my mind off of the politicking for a bit. Love ya.

[mrdreamjeans.livejournal.com]

*rolling eyes* Very funny!

[scottokc.livejournal.com]

I used to have a whole list like that. The only other one that I remember is if Bea Arthur married the rock star Sting, would that make her Bea Sting? (bee sting)

[designerotter.livejournal.com]

Those are the silliest combinations I've ever heard of ... and I laughed my head off ! [snort, snort]
Thanx for the giggles ... hope they signify that you can still crack a merry smile .
Hugs!

[labeartorycub.livejournal.com]

I've got one: If acress Bai Ling married someone named Peter Gual, she'd be Bai Ling Gual. *groan*

Hey-- I needed the laughs! Thanks. Hope you're laughing along with me. Hugs

[mrdreamjeans.livejournal.com]

I love that you hate that you love this:)

[mrdreamjeans.livejournal.com]

Perhaps, they can use it for a future Bond movie.

[mrdreamjeans.livejournal.com]

Daily! :)

[mrdreamjeans.livejournal.com]

Back at ya, my friend! I particularly got a kick out of "FedUP"! :)

HUGS!

[mrdreamjeans.livejournal.com]

I haven't lost my sense of humor. It's what keeps me going .. that, and the love and kindness of my family and friends.

Big HUGS!

[mrdreamjeans.livejournal.com]

I am laughing .. though, it took me a second .. mainly because I didn't pronounce "Bai" correctly in my head for the joke:)

HUGS!