Reading Journals and Reading Minds

Since BarakSF (Tim) introduced me to livejournal, I've made three entries and I'd not read the entries of my friends. Now, of course, that would consist of Tim and Tim (Stelthbear) in San Fran, as I've not figured out how to add people as yet:) Tim put both of them on my friends list the first night I wrote something. Tonight I read Barak's entries for the first time. It was interesting to see how his days flow, especially since we so recently worked on his house together in La Crosse. To my sadness, I waited too long to read the entries from our recent time together. But perhaps, that's all for the best.

I like to read stories or news where there is an emotional component. As a former feature writer, columnist and political reporter for a weekly, I like to read items that not only appeal to my intellect, but to my heart. Tim's entry right after his return from La Crosse, where he was so mightily affected by the history and memories of where he grew up, was my favorite. There is a scent to Tim's home that I associate with warm and loving memories and I too felt the sadness of the house as he cleared out the vestiges of his family. He has made the correct decision to sell it; it needs loving attention; the hard choice is also the right one. But....I liked the way he chose to make peace with the departed.... it's a necessary journey.

I also liked the entry and picture of Daisy and the surveys. I'm one of the few people who enjoys filling those surveys out each time. I know a lot about Tim, but manage to find out something new each time he fills one out. It also signals his evolution since his move to the Bay Area. (Hey Tim! Send them on to me. You know I'll fill them out:) Tim is at his best when he lets his emotions air, communicates, shares his feelings. He most frequently does that through his writing. Having said that, the content of his stories in California, his thoughts and feelings are often hard for me to read.

Tim and I are close. We've had a lot of fun and adventures together. I consider him family (and I've got a large and loving one). We are working through and moving past the awkwardness of that period when a relationship becomes strictly a friendship. However, sometimes little things will trigger unexpected sadness in me.

He wrote in a recent entry that he doesn't expect a knight in shining armour anymore. That makes me sad. I had hoped that I had shown him that was possible. I am still hopeful....a hopeful romantic. That knight isn't present right now in my life, but he's been around before and who's to say he isn't right around the corner. Till then I will focus on my friends. It's corny, perhaps, but I aspire to be a loyal, honorable and loving friend to a small, select group of loyal, honorable and loving people. I will be white-knight worthy:)

I'm sitting upstairs in my own home which I am selling. My home doesn't have the history that Tim's does, but in its six-year life, it has been the castle of my dreams and a tribute to the hard work and determination it took to create it while I was touring with "The Phantom of the Opera". I learned so much in creating it; about design, financing, decorating and the special challenges when you intentionally bring family into the mix. Even at my age, it sometimes is surprising to have done something so "grown-up". I will own other houses, but this one represents so much. I understand Tim's split feelings over selling his home all too well.

The other difficult choice in selling my home in Texas is that my parents lived here for 5 1/2 years. I was gone most of the time and they took very good care of it. But when I was here too, it was a constant negotiating act....son or homeowner. Two Alpha males in one home is one (some would say two) too many. I love my family, but it is next to impossible to share a home with your parents when you are calling the financial shots and dealing with everyone's very real fear of aging and irrelevance. It nearly cost me my relationship with my dad. Hence, I moved to Seattle for privacy and primacy; they have built a new home; my house sale closes September 30 and I move on to a new chapter in my life.

It's funny how you fall into patterns when you return home. After my long trip from Seattle here, I haven't felt like driving, even much like leaving the house. (Course the 97-degree days and 90% humidity has a lot to do with that:) I sense the feeling of isolation creeping in and I don't like that one bit. Anyone who knows me, knows I like take on big challenges and big risks, but earn and deserve huge achievements and huge rewards. I have one life and during it, I'm going to make a difference. I am not going to flub my one chance to have an exciting life!

In closing, I'm interested in peoples' thoughts on staying friends with your exes; the subject of aging parents and when decision-making starts to flipflop; what makes you indefinably sad; the thought that love doesn't have to be perfect to be good enough; and finally, "Despite what some people think, monotony, monogamy and monopoly are three different words." That's my quote and I wonder if anyone agrees with me. Discuss among yourselves.... Goodnight!

Reading Journals and Reading Minds

Since BarakSF (Tim) introduced me to livejournal, I've made three entries and I'd not read the entries of my friends. Now, of course, that would consist of Tim and Tim (Stelthbear) in San Fran, as I've not figured out how to add people as yet:) Tim put both of them on my friends list the first night I wrote something. Tonight I read Barak's entries for the first time. It was interesting to see how his days flow, especially since we so recently worked on his house together in La Crosse. To my sadness, I waited too long to read the entries from our recent time together. But perhaps, that's all for the best.

I like to read stories or news where there is an emotional component. As a former feature writer, columnist and political reporter for a weekly, I like to read items that not only appeal to my intellect, but to my heart. Tim's entry right after his return from La Crosse, where he was so mightily affected by the history and memories of where he grew up, was my favorite. There is a scent to Tim's home that I associate with warm and loving memories and I too felt the sadness of the house as he cleared out the vestiges of his family. He has made the correct decision to sell it; it needs loving attention; the hard choice is also the right one. But....I liked the way he chose to make peace with the departed.... it's a necessary journey.

I also liked the entry and picture of Daisy and the surveys. I'm one of the few people who enjoys filling those surveys out each time. I know a lot about Tim, but manage to find out something new each time he fills one out. It also signals his evolution since his move to the Bay Area. (Hey Tim! Send them on to me. You know I'll fill them out:) Tim is at his best when he lets his emotions air, communicates, shares his feelings. He most frequently does that through his writing. Having said that, the content of his stories in California, his thoughts and feelings are often hard for me to read.

Tim and I are close. We've had a lot of fun and adventures together. I consider him family (and I've got a large and loving one). We are working through and moving past the awkwardness of that period when a relationship becomes strictly a friendship. However, sometimes little things will trigger unexpected sadness in me.

He wrote in a recent entry that he doesn't expect a knight in shining armour anymore. That makes me sad. I had hoped that I had shown him that was possible. I am still hopeful....a hopeful romantic. That knight isn't present right now in my life, but he's been around before and who's to say he isn't right around the corner. Till then I will focus on my friends. It's corny, perhaps, but I aspire to be a loyal, honorable and loving friend to a small, select group of loyal, honorable and loving people. I will be white-knight worthy:)

I'm sitting upstairs in my own home which I am selling. My home doesn't have the history that Tim's does, but in its six-year life, it has been the castle of my dreams and a tribute to the hard work and determination it took to create it while I was touring with "The Phantom of the Opera". I learned so much in creating it; about design, financing, decorating and the special challenges when you intentionally bring family into the mix. Even at my age, it sometimes is surprising to have done something so "grown-up". I will own other houses, but this one represents so much. I understand Tim's split feelings over selling his home all too well.

The other difficult choice in selling my home in Texas is that my parents lived here for 5 1/2 years. I was gone most of the time and they took very good care of it. But when I was here too, it was a constant negotiating act....son or homeowner. Two Alpha males in one home is one (some would say two) too many. I love my family, but it is next to impossible to share a home with your parents when you are calling the financial shots and dealing with everyone's very real fear of aging and irrelevance. It nearly cost me my relationship with my dad. Hence, I moved to Seattle for privacy and primacy; they have built a new home; my house sale closes September 30 and I move on to a new chapter in my life.

It's funny how you fall into patterns when you return home. After my long trip from Seattle here, I haven't felt like driving, even much like leaving the house. (Course the 97-degree days and 90% humidity has a lot to do with that:) I sense the feeling of isolation creeping in and I don't like that one bit. Anyone who knows me, knows I like take on big challenges and big risks, but earn and deserve huge achievements and huge rewards. I have one life and during it, I'm going to make a difference. I am not going to flub my one chance to have an exciting life!

In closing, I'm interested in peoples' thoughts on staying friends with your exes; the subject of aging parents and when decision-making starts to flipflop; what makes you indefinably sad; the thought that love doesn't have to be perfect to be good enough; and finally, "Despite what some people think, monotony, monogamy and monopoly are three different words." That's my quote and I wonder if anyone agrees with me. Discuss among yourselves.... Goodnight!